A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. An American woman is sitting across from them. The woman isn’t paying attention to their conversation at first, but her attention is grabbed when she hears one of the men say the following:
“Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one last a time.”
“You foul-mouthed sex obsessed pig!” shouts the lady indignantly. “In this country, we don’t speak aloud in public places about our sex lives.”
“Hey, coola down lady,” said the man. “Who talkin’ abouta sexa? I’m a justa tellin’ my frienda how to spella ‘Mississippi’.”
- Mayday.... Hello, can u hear us?.... Can u hear us?.... We are sinking!!
- Hello! This is german coast guard.
- We are sinking! we're sinking!!!!!
- Erm... What are u sinking about???
- Name?
- Abu Said Jamal.
- Age?
- Theorti faif.
- Sex?
- For taimz a week.
- No, I mean, male or female?
- Male... Feemeil... Somtaimz camel...
A young colledge student, who was short of money, wrote to his father:
"No mon, no fun! Your son"
His father answered at once:
"How sad, too bad! Your dad"
И просто фразочки...
"Well, aren't we a fuckin' ray of sunshine?"
"Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?"
"Back off!! You're standing in my aura."
"Not all men are annoying. Some are dead."
"Wait...I'm trying to imagine you with a personality."
"You look like shit. Is that the style now?"
"Aw, did I step on your poor little bitty ego?"